Ambition is not a Dirty Word

Is It Honorable For Women To Give Up Their Dreams?

Debra: You preach ambition for women. Aren’t you forgetting something? What about life balance? Mothering? –32, with better values than “just career”

Say your ambition is to be a great wife, mother, friend, or fair-minded coworker who refuses on moral grounds to educate herself about office politics. That doesn’t bother you, does it? No, because that’s socially sanctioned ambition. You’ll likely regard the following women as having chosen “honorable ambition”.

Get More Power From Powerful Advice

Dear Debra:

I’m a twenty-nine-year-old associate in the intellectual property group of a leading law firm. It’s always been difficult for me to ask for help when I hit career bumps. I’m not really sure why. I guess it’s partly because I’m afraid the other person will say no. Plus, I’ve always had it in my head that if you want to get ahead, you should rely on yourself instead of exposing yourself as weak by asking for someone else’s advice. Recently, however, I’ve seen that asking for help can be a smart way to be more effective professionally. How can I get over not wanting to ask for help? And can you give me specifics about how to approach people so that I get what I need? – "Kirsten", New York City